Tinder, Grindr, and More: Supporting People with I/DD Who Are Dating Online

Workshop Description

People with intellectual and developmental disabilities (I/DD) want to be in relationships but often struggle with just how to meet people. Lots of folks today are meeting people online, often through dating apps. How do we successfully support someone dating online? And what are some specific things to know about dating apps? Join us for this two-part online workshop and leave feeling more confident that you can handle this topic.

Part One: Online Safety

This can be challenging for anyone, whether you’re a person with I/DD or someone who supports them. For example, as a support person, you might be asking yourself:

• How can I help someone when I don’t know anything about online dating or dating apps?
• What do I need to understand to be supportive in a positive way versus a fear-based way?
• What knowledge and skills are needed for people with I/DD to navigate safely dating online?

Learning Objectives:

• Review current online dating avenues, emphasizing dating apps that people with I/DD can use to meet new partners.
• Explore the difference between disability-specific apps, such as Glimmer, and apps for anyone, such as Tinder, and how to talk about these differences with those you support.
• Examine what knowledge and skills are needed to navigate online dating safely, including avoiding common scams.

Part Two: Using the App

Part two of the workshop assumes the person dating has chosen a dating app to work with, they’ve taken some measures to be aware of basic safety and common scams, and they’re signed up, ready to begin…but now what? In this workshop, we’ll explore the actual dating parts of online dating, such as how to set up an online profile that is more likely to help you date successfully. We’ll look at how to socialize successfully on the app and how to plan a date once you’ve found someone interesting. Importantly, we’ll also look at how to handle important emotional issues like rejection, frustration, ghosting, and more. And further, we’ll also look at how to know if things have gone well and what to do from there!

Learning Objectives:

• Explore how successful dating often starts with preparation and ways to get prepared.
• Examine how to set up a profile that will attract more people.
• Describe how to “court” someone, strike up conversations, and find someone you’re interested in.
• Explore strategies for successful, safe, and pleasurable dating online and in person.
• Examine the date and its success and what to do next!

This is a three-hour online workshop for professionals, administrators, self-advocates, parents, etc. We use Zoom, a video conference platform, to deliver the workshop. There will be an opportunity for questions and live engagement with the presenters.

Workshop Date: Tuesday, February 11, 2025, from 1 pm to 4:00 pm Eastern time (please note your time zone).

Access Instructions: After you register, you will get a confirmation email with instructions on accessing the workshop. If you don’t get the email, check your spam. You must have a stable internet connection to join, or you can call in via phone.

Workshop Presenters:

Kate Napolitano, MA, LCSW, is currently the Social Relationships and Sexuality Educator for an agency that serves individuals with intellectual and developmental disabilities called Wildwood Programs of Albany, NY. She also runs a small private psychotherapy practice in NY’s Hudson Valley, specializing in matters concerning Sexuality, Relationships, and Sexual Identities. Kate entered the clinical social work field in 2012 and studied the intersections of disability for the duration of that time. She holds a masters in Human Sexuality from NYU and a master’s in Social Work from Fordham University. Most recently, she has been a founding member of the new professional alliance SEDD: Sexuality Educators supporting people with Developmental Disabilities in NY. For more information about this new alliance, Kate can be reached at knapolitano@wildwoodprograms.org.

Tina Fitzgerald is a self-advocate from Syracuse, NY. Tina holds degrees in Special Education and Social Work. Tina is participating in the LEND program at Westchester Institute for Human Development. Tina works with Elevatus Training and the Self-Advocacy Association of New York State (SANYS).